It’s rare to get a perspective this nuanced on an issue so potentially incendiary. Zena has managed to create a painfully authentic snapshot from her own experiences, something many women (and men) have gone through in silent torture. It would be easy to paint the husband as a callous villain, or the wife as vindictive, but instead, they’re suffering human beings who yearn to do the right thing, adrift with no counselors as to what IS the right thing to do. And as much as the husband is making choices harmful to himself and his wife, HER predicament – does she keep trying, keep tolerating her increasing loneliness? – serves as a palpable motivation to continue enabling a destructive relationship. As a gay man, I had several chances to marry a woman and have children (what I wanted more than anything). But I denied myself this, knowing that if I was weak, I would destroy another human being. This might encourage others to exercise discernment before entering a tragically doomed covenant.

Evan Zander